


I Hope Senpai Will Notice Me

by holy_wow



Category: Free!
Genre: M/M, Pining, awkward Rin, makoharu is completely a side ship in this
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-12-14
Updated: 2014-01-19
Packaged: 2018-01-04 13:56:46
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 13,403
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1081816
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/holy_wow/pseuds/holy_wow
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Rin realizes he's crushing hard on his Captain. Rin isn't particularly elated with this knowledge.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

Rin didn’t expect, when he went to practice after the regionals, for a warm welcome. He’d messed up a lot and he realized that. Still, looking at some of the faces of his teammates made the idea of bettering his relationship with the Samezuka swim team and making up for the shit he pulled daunting. Hell, the reception for Ai and Mikoshiba were surprising and he didn’t actually deserve them he figured. Rin glanced over the faces and tried to keep his posture straight and face calm. He tried to not let it get to him. Mikoshiba turned, telling them to all get in the water they had things to do. The Captain looked back at him once and Rin met his gaze, something akin to relief swelling when the Captain nodded at him before turning to follow the others. It was an uphill challenge, Rin knew, but he could do it. He rolled his shoulder and followed after the team, Ai waiting to walk beside him. 

He didn’t need any more problems on his plate. Catching up with his family, making time to visit his mother and remembering to keep in contact with Gou, getting back together with his old friends, with Rei, making it up to the swim team, not to mention general schoolwork and swim training. Rin was busy. It was a good busy, he wanted to do it. It was a fulfilling sort that he hadn’t felt in forever, but he didn’t need anymore. Especially nothing so stressful as finding out he was had a crush.

It was a slow process and he didn’t realize it was happening. At first he thought it was the same as Ai. Rin knew he liked praise, he liked people noticing him. In a way he was attention starved. Even without that, he’d always responded to attention of any kind. So when the others noticed him he of course responded well. When Mikoshiba noticed him it felt more important, warmer, bigger, but Rin pegged that to Mikoshiba’s title. He was an upperclassmen, a hell of a swimmer, and the Captain. His opinion was damn important. Rin figured it was that, too, when Mikoshiba would scold him and his stomach would drop and his throat constricted. He was used to that, Mikoshiba’s cold stare as the young man told him to shape up, but now it seemed to hurt even more that he was trying to be better.

Rin did eventually realize his problem. They were doing a competition between teammates, Mikoshiba joking about ranking everybody again. Everybody in sections for a race, Mikoshiba in the first batch and the Vice Captain Kiozumi the judge, timer in hand, Mikoshiba a mile ahead of the competitors though it wasn’t his best time by far. Kiozumi had been sure to point that out with a grin and Mikoshiba shoved at the vice captain’s shoulder as he shook out his hair. Rin watched, in the third group and waiting as the others got in the water, and there was a bit of relief in knowing he didn’t compete with Mikoshiba. Coming to Samezuka, with the mindset he had before, and then watching Mikoshiba swim, competing against the captain, he probably would have only been worse off. As the second batch began to finish their fourth lap Rin approached his lane.

Ai was in the second batch, coming in third and Rin smiled at him as he fixed his goggles, nodding. Ai deserved that, the recognition. Then he faced the water, staring down the lane and listened for the signal. He dove perfectly, sliding through the water and surfacing to cut down the lane. It was, in the end, an easy victory. He beat his own personal time. Ai was of course right there with a big smile on his face congratulating him. Rin nodded, pulling off his goggles and cap, trying to work up a smile for Ai. Then everything was different because there was a bigger hand clasping his shoulder, jostling him, and Rin glanced up to see Mikoshiba grinning at him. “You did good. I’m impressed Matsuoka.”

Rin stared up at him with wide eyes, vaguely remembering to nod before Mikoshiba walked past him. That seemed to be some sign to the rest of the team, some of them making their way over to talk to him too. Still, his eyes followed the broad back of Mikoshiba until the Captain stood beside Kiozumi who was on the starter block, the vice-captain nodding to Rin as well as if to say ‘yes it was impressive’ and Rin’s head snapped back to front, eyeing the crowd. They were loud, touching him. He hated it, but it was a start towards getting somewhere. Ai was nearly glowing it looked.

The rest of practice was boring, the day fairly short actually. Rin got to talking to some people about their strokes. He tried to not be distracted, to pay attention to the people. There was no reason he kept looking towards Mikoshiba. So he didn’t. He wasn’t. Rin was happy when the captain told them to get to the showers and out of there. Rin stopped to get dinner, alone since Ai went to a study group, and then after his homework had a late evening run. None of it really cleared his head, thoughts just running in circles, and after the run he stopped by the pool. The showers weren’t really better than the dorm but they were empty and he had a change of clothes in his locker.

Kiozumi was walking out as he approached and Rin stiffened. Kiozumi had never given him cause to be wary but the guy wasn’t friendly either. When he stared Rin returned it with a frown. “No swimming without a partner, at least,” Kiozumi said.

“I know the damn rules.” Rin knew better than most that anybody could drown, no matter how good a swimmer. Not that he’d ever share that with Kiozumi, he imagined. 

Kiozumi was unimpressed, fixing his jacket. “Good. Then make sure to follow them,” was all he said and Rin was sure that was a jab about the regionals and he growled. Kiozumi didn’t know shit. But the vice-captain made his way around Rin and Rin turned to glare at him until he disappeared. Rin stomped into the pool, ripping off his jacket and clothes to toss them at his locker and into the shower. He turned the water too hot, eyes closed as he stood under the spray. Rin wasn’t sure if Kiozumi just didn’t like him, something understandable, or if it was because of the regionals. But no matter what it was Rin didn’t think he deserved that sort of cold scorn. He wasn’t a bad guy, Rin thought, leaning against the tile wall with an arm and watching the water slip away into the drain.

**You did good.**

Rin frowned, that feeling again that swelled and twisted and was as hot as the water at his back. But when he closed his eyes he saw bright yellow and a big smile. Rin’s eyes snapped open and he pushed away from the wall. There was something inside him lighting up and it wasn’t just the eyes he was picturing. Rin swallowed hard before muttering a violent curse, turning off the water and stomping out. This wasn’t good. This was the opposite of good. This was bad. And Rin had no fucking clue how to deal with it. Worse, the next practice, Gou walked in and Rin watched those same yellow eyes he imagined light up with that same smile.


	2. Chapter 2

Rin emerged from the water with a gasp, hoisting himself up and out of the water. Ai handed him a towel, going on about something or another. Rin still had the bad habit of letting Ai speak and listening to half of it. It was how he did his classes too, learning quick to figure out the important bits and ignoring everything else. He glanced up, a voice familiar and that was when he saw Gou with Mikoshiba. Rin swallowed, something small inside him panicking because Miksohiba was in his damn speedo again and Rin knew how much Gou liked muscles. She was worse than him and-

He made his way over, stomping and growling, forgetting about Ai, Mikoshiba spotting him and grinning. Not that smile that is bright and looks so damn dorkish because he’s somehow (ok not somehow his sister is fucking amazing) enraptured by Gou but a grin. Rin did not pay attention to that as he growled, eyes narrowing at Mikoshiba and then Gou, who actually smiled when she saw him. That was a good sign. She wasn’t into Mikoshiba. Probably. Maybe. Why the hell wouldn’t she be into Mikoshiba? Rin, thinking himself in circles, stopped that to wrap his arm around Gou’s shoulder as she stepped closer to him, and stared hard at Mikoshiba. 

The giant just smiled, glancing between them. “Well there’s Matsuoka. And you can come talk to me whenever and we can schedule some more joint practices. Looking forward to it actually. Iwatobi has a good team,” he said.

Gou practically glowed at the praise, nodding happily. “Right of course. We’ll discuss some dates,” she said with an eager nod. Rin was less than thrilled.

He wasn’t sure how happy he was that Gou stayed until after practice, either. He didn't want to fuck anything up, and with the mood he was in it was likely. He wanted to see her, had texted her more often, but in his mood, with her and him, Rin struggled. Still, he didn't have the heart to tell he'd to leave, even if he had a dozen excuses on his tongue at ready. Gou bounced into his dorm, looking at everything before dropping into the chair by the desk.

Rin sat on his bed, rolling his eyes at her. "It’s a dorm, Gou."

"Shush," Gou huffed, spinning in the chair before facing him and suddenly looking sober. "How are you?”

Rin shrugged and when that wasn't enough for her he spoke. "Absolutely grand. Better than new."

"Oh, sarcasm, you must be doing alright." She smiled, looking relieved. "It’s hard to tell sometimes thru texts. I'm glad Samezuka has been treating you good."

"Samezuka has always been alright."

"Yeah? I guess. Mikoshiba seems to be fair."

Rin bristled. "Does he?"

Gou frowned right back. "Yes he does. I know he kept you out of-"

"That doesn't have anything to do with this," Rin snapped.

"Then- ugh is this a big brother thing? Rin," she whined.

"What?"

"Don't be like that."

Rin growled at her. "Like what?"

"I don't like him like that OK?" Rin started a bit, a little confused and wondering why the hell not until he remembered it was a good thing. "He's sweet and all. I just- ugh I don't know."

"What the fuck does that mean?"

"I don't know. Just- what's your problem? Don't you not want me to date him? Should I?"

"No!"

"Then what the fuck is your problem?"

"Don't you curse. And don't talk to Mikoshiba."

"Don’t- hypocrite. And are you even listening? I don't want to date him. But I'm going to talk to him. And! I can date who I want."

"Bullshit!"

"Um-" Ai interrupted, Rin not even hearing him come in at all. The boy glanced between them. "Matsuoka-san has a good thought. You shouldn't date somebody if you don't feel something, if you can't think of a happy future with them. If you just try to date somebody to have somebody then you're no longer in the running for your love. And neither is the other person, this person who might be thinking about forever and you're just there for today."

"Oh wow you've got it in words! And you're sweet! I should bring Nagisa so you can rub off on him." She thought a moment. "In a controlled environment so he doesn’t rub off on you."

Rin didn’t watch Ai stutter, the older boy turning to his sister and snapping about how bad of an idea that was. Ai made his way to the desk where Rin could see the young man's wallet. "B-besides, Mikoshiba-senpai is leaving soon. Probably."

"What!?" Both red heads snapped, Rin belatedly catching himself.

Ai flinched. "Ah- not right away. But he's going to be graduating soon and has already being scouted. If you aren’t serious about him it’s probably best not to." He snatched his wallet. "Um it was good to see you again Matsuoka-san. Excuse me, sorry for sticking my nose in your conversation."

“No, thank you. You put it in words,” Gou said. “See, Rin okay I know what I’m doing.”

Rin stared at her and she deflated to glare back at him. Ai glanced between them before speaking again. “Uh, I’ll be going, then. Sorry, again, I am glad I helped. Un, excuse me.” He turned and fled.

"He's sweet. Bit of a romantic huh?"

Rin stared at the door a moment, thinking about Ai said before eyes snapping back to Gou. "You like him?"

"What? No!"

"Then who do you like?"

"Nobody! None of your business!"

"None of- bullshit! There is somebody! Tell me!" Rin leaned forward, eyes narrowed.   
Gou gave an impressive growl in response. She stayed for a bit, the two just talking. A bit about the others, about the time Makoto got his head stuck in his shirt and even Haru had to laugh, or when Nagisa made them all go out to the movies and Rin didn’t come even though he’d been invited. Rin had to promise to come and actually have dinner with Gou and their mom that week some time before Gou left. Rin, of course, walking her to the train and making her promise to call him when she got home.

When he came back Ai was there, sitting on his bunk with his DS in hand. The younger boy looked up and smiled, welcoming him back. Rin nodded, shedding his jacket and shirt in favor of the tank and dropping onto his bunk. It was then Ai spoke up, closing the gaming system and peaking down. “I’m sorry for intruding on your conversation with your sister.”

“Don’t be. Was kind of stupid anyway,” he said with a shrug, arms behind his head.

Ai chewed on his lip a moment before continuing. “It’s not really any of my business but, um, does Senpai like anybody?”

Rin jerked, half sitting up and trying to glare at Ai but his eyes were too wide with shock. “What?”

“I just- you seem-“ he paused to collect himself, jumping as bad as Rin. “It wouldn’t be unusual for you to like somebody is all.”

“Fuck no. I haven’t had time for that,” he said, wondering how the fuck coincidences like this happened. Ai couldn’t know- could he?

Ai just looked at him with those bright blue eyes and Rin felt his heart hammer. “I used to think you were fancying Nanase-san.” What? Rin pulled a face. “But maybe- is it Mikoshiba-senpai?”

Rin wanted to say he didn’t blush but Ai smiled, not a patronizing or even victorious smile but a gentle encouraging one, and Rin knew he was fucked. It probably shouldn’t have surprised him. Ai seemed to just know shit. He watched. Ai was good at that, observing people and being where he needed to be. Rin worried about how obvious he’d been and what the fuck his tells were. He sputtered, glancing away before snarling up at Ai. “Don’t you fucking tell a soul! It’s not- it’s nothing big.”

Ai held his hands up in surrender. “Of course. I wouldn’t ever.”

Rin stares up at him and Ai smiles down. “How long did you know?”

“I didn’t know until now. But I noticed you were always a little different around Mikoshiba-senpai.”

Oh fuck. Rin hid his face in his hands and quietly panicked. Ai, of course noticed.

“N-no not horribly just- you’re interactions with him are sparse and I just thought something was- it’s not a bad thing- I’m sure you’re safe Senpai.”

Rin didn’t lift his head. “I’m moving back to Australia.”

Ai frowned, quietly sighing, and obviously wasn’t going to take him seriously. Which was fine, Rin didn’t have the cash to go back to Australia. Especially since he’d said before he’d have to be paid a gross amount to consider going back there. “Maybe we should go get dinner?” he offered.

Rin glared at him. “Don’t ignore me. I’m serious.”

“You’ll fight Australia before dealing with a crush, Senpai?” Ai said as he crawled down from his bunk.

“At least I know how to fight Australia. There is training when you first move there, ya know. Then once you take down your first kangaroo they give you the customary survival warrior badge.”

Ai snickered, shrugging into his jacket. “They don’t have warrior badges for surviving crushes.”

“That’s why I’m considering Australia again.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I actually only have parts of this planned out. Hopefully all of this will stay on track. Your comments are always appreciated.
> 
> Also, as warning, I apologize if I butcher Japanese in anyway in this fic but I couldn't just remove it all because it's a rather important part of Nitori's character. So, I do honestly apologize if I butcher it but I am attempting not to.


	3. Chapter 3

Rin sat with his legs in the pool, watching with narrow eyes as Mikoshiba continued to gush over Gou. He would have been racing Haru except Gou had glared at him and Mikoshiba had told him to put it on the back burner until they figure out what they’re doing. Rin wanted to say he wasn’t dwelling on the fact that Mikoshiba had given him a look and he wasn’t sure what kind of look it was but it didn’t sit well. Haru didn’t care, looking off to the side as Makoto said something that appeased him. Makoto was still a saint. Rin was coming to the conclusion that Ai was like a normal level Makoto, and Makoto was just some freaking godsend here in Iwatobi to save everybody else from Haru’s shit.

Or maybe to save all of Iwatobi from its weird ass swim team, Rin thought, eyeing Rei who was still stretching and Nagisa who was being quiet. Not silent, just quietly talking beside Makoto, who had that mollifying encouraging smile while he listened and watched Haru at the same time. Nagisa was only ever quiet when there was trouble on the horizon. Rin’s eyes narrowed when Nagisa glanced at him and then back to Makoto.   
Fuck. That.

“Whatever it is, no Nagisa,” Rin yelled, attempting to look authoritative but that never really worked. Rin could look intimidating but when he tried to be authoritative nobody paid him any attention.

Nagisa gasped, looking offended. Then he turned to Makoto as if to tattle, because it wasn’t like Makoto was right there the entire time or anything. Makoto just shook his head. He didn’t even look authoritative and he had more control than Rin ever did. Makoto muttered something Rin couldn’t hear and Nagisa looked back to Rin.

“No.”

Nagisa looked incredibly petulant and Makoto laughed behind his hand. Rin grinned, feeling accomplished as Nagisa stuck his tongue out, the red head laughing. The blonde then turned and skipped off, probably to tattle to Rei too about how mean he was. He as mildly curious what Nagisa had been whispering about, but he did firmly believe it couldn’t be anything good. Rin slipped into the water, emerging to smooth his hair back. Mikoshiba was talking to Kiozumi, a slight shift to the way he held himself. Mikoshiba was one of those guys that oozed leadership and confidence and shift between casual and captain was subtle because of it.

Rin was so upset with himself that he noted that sort of thing and dropped back into the water with a glare. Most avoided him after that, his team members anyway, as practiced continued. It was detrimental to the whole ‘make good with his team’ thing but Rin couldn’t be bothered to reach out. The Iwatobi team didn’t seem to care, or Ai. Ai of course fit well with the group, Nagisa thrilled to have somebody as tiny as him around. Poor Ai tried to keep up, looking incredibly flustered and red. Nagisa used to be so adorable, Rin thought watching him hang off of Ai before throwing a comment at Rei that had the glasses blushing too, and Rin wondered where the hell that went. Now the blonde devil was out to corrupt Ai. Rin wanted Gou to get her ass over there so he could point it out.

“Are you okay, Rin-senpai? You look…” Ai asked, apparently able to untangle himself from Nagisa’s web temporarily.

“Rinrin always looks angry. Or constipated. Angry about being constipated. You can tell the difference?” Nagisa said, interrupting Rin from answering.

Rin glared up at the blonde from where he held the ledge in the pool. “Nobody asked you, Nagisa.”

“Well it’s true.”

“Better than letting all the air out of that hole in your face.”

Nagisa stuck his tongue out at Rin, who just smirked before turning back to see Ai fidgeting a bit as he looked on. Rin rolled his eyes. He was fine. Everything was fine. He sighed, glancing at Haru who was floating off to the side, of course mute during this whole thing. Rin thought back to what Ai had said, about ‘fancying’ (who the fuck said fancy?) Haru. Rin cringed at the idea. 

“I hadn’t realize Mikoshiba-san was that much taller than Makoto-senpai,” Rei said, a vague comment, probably thought he wouldn’t be heard over Nagisa who had gone back to Ai and was asking something about rooming with Rin (again, Nagisa was totally snooping).

Everybody of course turned to look. Nagisa was grinning again. “I don’t think Mako-chan knows what to do with somebody taller than him with that blush.”

Haru was suddenly paying attention too, vertical in the water. Rin noted that the same time he noted that Makoto’s shoulders were a bit tense. Makoto had a way of never seeming as tall and big as he was. Rin never thought Makoto was short but it was always surprising to remember just how tall and big he was. Especially when Makoto was the one reminding, standing to his full height and shoulders squared and looking down at you with hard eyes. That was jarring. But now Makoto was looking to the side, hand to the back of his neck, standing in contrast to Mikoshiba who never hid his height. Mikoshiba who was fully dressed for some reason in some nice jeans, his shirt still damp and how was that attractive when Rin had seen the captain in a goddamn speedo let alone the way Mikoshiba was just leaning against the wall with one shoulder? Why was that attractive? He just looked so comfortable and relaxed, confident as he looked down slightly at Makoto, a lopsided grin on his face.

“-kinda just want to climb him like a tree,” Nagisa said, making everybody but Haru sputter, the stoic blue eyed boy just ducking under the water. Rin watched him go before glancing back to Mikoshiba, pointedly ignoring anything else out of Nagisa’s mouth because it wasn’t as if he needed help thinking about- about things. He frowned, refusing to even look at Nagisa at this point. 

“What are you talking about?” Gou said, walking over, looking more angry than scandalized and that worried Rin a bit except his attention was back to Mikoshiba and Makoto. Rin couldn’t handle everything happening at once but Makoto had covered his mouth in a look of thoughtful embarrassment and, after scanning the pool, was walking to where Haru was doing whatever Haru did. Rin thought he was pouting but Rin still knew fuck all about Haru’s grand range of expressions. But Makoto’s expression twisted something in Rin’s chest and he hoisted himself out, ignoring Nagisa and Gou, making his way to Mikoshiba with a glare, the Captain hollering at Kiozumi. At least until he saw Rin, then he raised a brow. Still looking fucking attractive leaning against a wall.

“Matsuoka, what’s up? I got a bit of time.”

“Time?”

Mikoshiba chuckled. “Leaving early today. Got some other things to take care of. Worst day what with Iwatobi here but- didn’t I announce this?”

Rin may or may not sometimes not listen to Mikoshiba so he could stare at him instead. Rin wasn’t going to admit this. “Right, sorry,” he said with a shrug before eyeing the taller man. “What’d you say to Makoto?”

“Tachibana-san? Why?”

Rin glared at him.

Mikoshiba stared a bit, as if searching, and Rin refused to back down. He wanted to say it was just curiosity, or he was worried for Makoto, but really he couldn’t deny the thought that somehow it wasn’t Gou but fucking Makoto he was wanting that made Rin want to scream. Or he was getting over Gou since she didn’t care and suddenly was chasing Makoto’s ass. Or something. Rin didn’t spend very long analyzing the sudden overwhelming twisting feeling in his gut. Besides, Mikoshiba had a better chance of wooing Gou. Hopefully Haru and Makoto had gotten around to swapping spit already. Or at least holding hands. Rin stole another glance in that direction, glaring at Makoto and Haru because he wasn’t going to worry about that too.

“You’re worried for him?” Mikoshiba said, sounding light and sort of wondering. Rin’s head snapped back and he tensed. What the fuck did that mean? “I was just asking about Nanase-san, really. I don’t know much about Iwatobi but from what I’ve gathered he’s the best to ask.”

“What’d you want to know?”

“Mostly about his swimming. For age groups, he probably still holds a record.” Mikoshiba shrugged. 

Rin glanced back again to where Haru was pouting, Makoto smiling that dopey smile. Not that Rin could see it, Makoto with his back facing them, but Rin could guess. “Yea, everybody thinks his swimming is amazing.”

Mikoshiba hummed, pushing himself up from the wall, a hand in his pocket. “He’s special. But I don’t think I could handle him. Got my hands full with you,” he said with a shrug and a big happy smile and Rin was totally blushing, he could feel the heat in his cheeks, and could only try to look away scowling. Dammit the tips of his ears were probably the same color as his hair. 

“Oie- Sei you’re going to be late!” Kiozumi yelled and Mikoshiba jumped, looking over his shoulder.

“What? Oh shi- ah.” Mikoshiba glanced at the clock on the wall and cringed. “Welp I’m going to have to run,” he said, walking backwards and yelling for the whole pool to hear. “Alright guys, I gotta go. You all do your best and listen to Kiozumi and Gou-kun or we’ll be running a lot more, got it? Good.”

Rin watched him from the corner of his eye, thankful for the save. At least until Mikoshiba looked back at him. “And Matsuoka- we should talk later! Some things I should tell you. We’ll have to make time.” And then he was jogging away.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I wasn't sure if Makoharu was just going to be heavily implied or if I was going to make it explicit. It's going to end up being explicit guys, but until it shows up in the story I won't tag it because that would be unfair to people. But fair warning to readers now.
> 
> Also Nagisa being a little shit has little to do with the plot (hahaha plot) at this point. In this chapter I just wanted to have some focus on Iwatobi and Nagisa is always doing something anyway.


	4. Chapter 4

Rin glared at Ai as the short boy as he walked ahead of him. Rin no longer trusted the little blue eyed devil. Short people were evil. Evil, troublesome little beings. Like there wasn’t enough space inside them to work properly. There was a thing about that. Fairies. From Peter Pan. Yes that’s what it was. Rin looked back at Ai, and knowing all the other short people he knew from his sister to fucking Nagisa, he thought that fit. Because anybody normal was manageable, and the fucking trees were saints (his opinion of Mikoshiba may or may not be biased but considering he was still on the swim team he thought it was applicable). Ai almost had him fooled but no, Ai was as much of a devil as the rest. Not even counting his habits as a dorm mate.

But this- this was unacceptable and something he’d expect more from Nagisa. Or Gou maybe. Not Ai. Ai had him completely fooled before this. When Ai looked back with a promising smile Rin shuddered and tried to intimidate him with a glare. Somehow Ai had become immune to those and Rin didn’t have a lot of other tactics. He wasn’t sure what Ai had planned beside the fact he didn’t want a plan or action or anything and Ai needed to calm the fuck down about this whole thing he wasn’t being helpful dear lord somebody shackle the short people they’re getting out of hand and the smile on Ai’s face scared him.

Rin had tried not to fret about what Mikoshiba might need to talk to him about. It was honestly a legit worry on what the captain of his swim team would want to talk to him about. The swim team was one of the few things Rin still had, and even if he was still figuring out his future and if the Olympics were his dream or a burden he tricked himself into carrying, he wanted to be on the swim team. And, the slight panic of being alone with Mikoshiba was a troubling thought but Rin was pretty sure he could handle that. He had thought.

Ai had asked what was wrong, and Rin had thought he was being sweet and worried but now fully believed he was nosey and had a thing for his pain and perhaps it had taken nothing for Nagisa to corrupt him. Rin had eventually confided in him about Mikoshiba just tossing that horrible stressful comment at him before leaving. It was a very irresponsible thing to do. They had sat on his bunk, Ai sitting wrapped around a pillow with big eyes and eager to listen and Rin spat out what happened and tried not to make a big deal of it. He left out most of the embarrassing things, like the jealousy and that warm feeling when Mikoshiba had talked about having his hands full with him with that smile (and Rin was quite proud of himself that the thought “I really could fill your hands, Captain” had come much later because that was incredibly embarrassing). It’d all gone downhill from there because then Ai was talking.

“You should seduce the captain, Rin-senpai!”

Rin chocked on air as he stared back. “What?”

“Seduce Mikoshiba-senpai. Woo him. It’d be wonderful. I’ll help.” He pumped a fist, a sparkle in his eyes that had Rin scared.

“Wha- no. That’s not…” Rin shut up and composed his thoughts because holy hell that is not how crushes worked. He was just going to quietly stew in his feelings until they disappeared or until Mikoshiba disappeared. That was fine. This was fine. Rin had no idea how to even proceed. “He’s not even gay.”

Ai blinked. “Love doesn’t have anything to do with gender.” Rin was going to murder his roommate. He was willing to bet Nagisa could help bury the body and he could totally puppy eye Makoto into helping with the physical labor. Tho the more people that know is bad, he was going to have to be smart about this. “I think you’d be good for each other! I’m totally rooting for you Rin-senpai.”

“No you’re not. Stop.”

“But wouldn’t it be great if you could woo him?” Who used words like woo? How old was Ai’s soul? “And then you guys could go on sweet dates and hold hands and you’d definitely be a bit happier Rin-senpai. And you deserve to be happy.”

Dates? Holding hands? And there would be hugs and kisses and cuddling with Mikoshiba would probably be amazing because he was so much bigger and could just wrap around him, Rin could just picture it with a movie going on and Mikoshiba’s arms wrapped around him with that dopey bright smile. Rin was blushing again. Shit. He hadn’t thought about these things. He’d just kinda ogled Mikoshiba from a distance and thought about how attractive and how good the captain was. He hadn’t considered there ever being a thing.

Now he was thinking about there being a thing and his chest was just warm and painful, his heart hammering. Damn Ai. He was going to burn his porn collection. Watch the little short devil try to buy new ones. Ai just glowed, smiling at him over the pillow, aimlessly chatting about wooing and stuff. Rin had kicked him off the bed and the entire night he spent fantasizing about romantic things. It was horrifying.

He was able to get his head together throughout school, a conversation texted to Gou and a short four text conversation with Haru- through Makoto’s phone because Haru couldn’t be bothered to carry his own and then a text from Nagisa because apparently he was around and bothersome enough to have to give his opinion on their inane argument (of four texts that did not start as an argument- Rin set records with Haru over competing). He didn’t see Ai or Mikoshiba. He did not think about holding hands.

Then Ai was beside him in the locker room and smiled up at him and everything came back. “Rin-senpai! I came up with an idea today! Leave everything to me!” And then he walked off and Rin watched his back, mouth gaping. He didn’t want Mikoshiba to know. Mikoshiba was too busy making puppy eyes at his sister, wagging his tail. Besides, the less people that had an inkling he was gay the better. He made a deep aggravated sound deep in his throat and went after Ai.

Except the tiny fucker was already talking to Mikoshiba, all smiles and subdued gestures, and Rin quickly tried to find something to do while not looking suspicious. When he was finished stretching he was surprised to see Mikoshiba approaching him, and shrunk back a bit even as the tall Captain was smiling. “Oie, Matsuoka, today I’ll be staying after to train with you, no worries. We’ll talk too and get everything out of the way,” he said.

Rin looked to Ai, whose expression could only be interpreted as ‘Play along Senpai!’ and then back at Mikoshiba and nodding. “Yea, sure, fine by me.” He had actually planned on finishing a report tonight but apparently he was going to instead be alone with his crush, who wore a speedo, in a giant ass pool. He sincerely hoped Mikoshiba didn’t ask him for form advice.

Rin’s problem arose when they’d finished. There wasn’t much talking during the swimming and training. It was, however, cut short since Mikoshiba wanted to make time to talk to him. Rin wasn’t really complaining so much as worried. But he followed Mikoshiba quietly to the showers- which was where it started. Because Mikoshiba peeled off his speedo and walked into the showers like it was nothing. Which it should have been. But Rin was staring at his wonderful ass and that was doing nothing to help with getting naked to rinse off himself. Rin averted his eyes, cleansed his thoughts, and willed away any stiffness that had happened as he made his way into the shower.

Mikoshiba was either dense or it worked better than he thought it would. He didn’t exactly look over to check Mikoshiba’s expression. Which is why he jumped when Mikoshiba spoke. “So, is there anybody you like, Matsuoka?”

“What?” Rin screeched, now looking at Mikoshiba.

He opened his mouth and then stopped as if deciding no, he wouldn’t make an excuse. “Between the bets some of the team has and then your sister texting me to figure it out I thought being straight with you was the best way to ask.”

“Bets?”

“You’re… not social. So guys were wondering. Stupid shit, they got a couple bets going on things. Ignore them. I’m pretty sure none of them had it right anyway.”

No, they probably didn’t. Especially depending on how long the bet was lasting. “Why?”

“Most of them were betting on girls in your classes or that have a crush on you. Me and Nitori were pretty sure it was Nanase-san. Though now I’m thinking maybe Tachibana-san.”

Rin recoiled, mouth agape. “Why does everybody think I’m trying to get a taste of Haru’s ass?”

“You were pretty focused on it for a while.”

Rin chocked a bit.

“So not Nanase-san then. You were pretty worried about Tachibana-san. It was cute. Him?”

“No!” Rin may or may not have had a small puppy crush on Makoto when they were kids that he did not recognize until later but no- that was over. “I don’t- Iwatobi is crazy there is no fucking way- no.” How the fuck was he having this conversation? Again?

“So not Iwatobi then. Alright.”

“Why do you care?”

“Like I said, it’s mostly because your sister asked me to snoop. She must be sorta desperate coming to me. Probably texted Nitori first. But yea, Gou-kun asked me if I knew if you were eyeing somebody.”

Rin was going to be an only child. “You talk to my sister?”

“Sometimes.” Mikoshiba shrugged, smoothing his vibrant hair back. Rin stared. “You don’t need to be so worried. I mean your sister is cute but she isn’t interested and I’ve got the hint. It’d be creepy if I did any more than this.”

“I- what? That’s-,” actually really awesome what the fuck, “you’re giving up?”

“I’m not going to force myself in. I have a sister too. I try to act like I’d prefer boys to treat her.” Mikoshiba looked over and smiled from under the water. Rin was still staring. “So, I also get the big brother thing, not that my sister is old enough to be dating yet. I hope. Anyway, I get it. But you don’t have to worry as much.”

“Just stay away from her.”

Mikoshiba laughed, turning off his water. “Well she wants to know if her big brother likes anybody.”

“She’s nosy.”

“It’s cute. So- who do you like?”

“I’m not going to tell you so you can impress her.”

“Stingy. But that means there is somebody?” He looked back from where he’d walked, the towel wrapping around his waist.

Shit. Shit. Shit. “You said you were giving up on her anyway.” Play it off, he could do this. “You really ought to start looking for somebody who appreciates you. That might be difficult and all.”

Mikoshiba grinned, letting out a laugh as he reached his locker, Rin opening his. “Looks like you got a smart mouth and a loose tongue when I’m naked, Matsuoka.”

Rin was blushing to the tip of his ears, heart beating loudly, but Mikoshiba had his back to him and laughed at his joke, tossing on sweat pants and a tank top that clung to the damp skin. Rin didn’t look as he slipped into his own clothes. “I prefer my prey naked and defenseless.”

Mikoshiba snorted. “Not often I’m called defenseless.” He closed his locker. “Mind moving this to the office? Got some paperwork I think I’m supposed to pick up and it seems more official for a talk.”

Oh. Right. The talk. Rin nodded, closing his locker and following Mikoshiba out. He shifted, getting his jacket to settle across his shoulders as they walked. Rin peeked from beneath his hair. He watched Mikoshiba’s back as they walked. He was stressing over the talk and was wondering what it was about because he still didn’t feel like he belonged. But he also wondered, following the captain, how it would feel to walk beside him. Stupid sappy thought but Mikoshiba had one hand at his side swaying and Rin wondered about maybe brushing knuckles and Mikoshiba would probably blush and grin like a dork and then maybe they’d interlock fingers because nobody was around and-his shoes scuffed as he walked, pouting.

They made their way up to the little office. Mostly it was where the manager did his business, meaning most people didn’t visit. Rin had only been there once before, and that was to join the team. Kiozumi was walking out as they approached, the young man glancing at both of them. Rin felt his chest constrict, hating the expression. But Mikoshiba just waved. “Always working, Kiozumi.”

“Just dropping off some of the times and paperwork,” he said with a shrug, and then held out his hand. “Keys.”

“Rude.” But, Mikoshiba fished through his pockets and pulled off one of the keys from the ring, tossing it to Kiozumi. “Take care of my girl. Don’t treat her like you treat yours.”

“It’s your fault my bike crashed.”

“Don’t blame me for your lack of grace,” Mikoshiba said with a laugh, twirling the keys on his finger. “Say hi to your brother for me.”

“Before I bury him, sure.” Kiozumi huffed, pushing past them, ignoring Rin completely.

Mikoshiba watched him go, before catching his keys in his hand again and pocketing them. At Rin’s confusion he chuckled. “He crashed his motorbike a while back. We were being stupid and- you remember he didn’t swim for a week? School rules say no jobs so it’s taking a while for him to work up a way to fix it.”

Rin glanced back up at him. “You have a bike?”

“Yep. I work during the school breaks at my Uncle’s shop. And my family after my first win at the regionals chipped in and got it for me. About the same for Kiozumi.” Mikoshiba shrugged and made his way into the office. “Also so he could get home faster- not have to fight the trains and such. Family keeps him on a short leash and he gets temperamental sometimes. So don’t take his attitude too personally.”

Rin glanced back slightly, wondering about Kiozumi’s family but not caring enough to try and pry. “He doesn’t like me.” 

“Kiozumi doesn’t like most people. That’s his thing.” Mikoshiba laughed, walking to the desk to lean over it, looking at the paper and folders. “Some people are just awkward. He just hates people. Honestly, don’t let him bother you. It’s really not worth it.”

That was harsh. Rin raised a brow, taking a seat. “Not worth it?”

“Nope. Already a grumpy old man too in love with rules and traditions. You don’t have to worry and pander to him. He’s good at what he does and you just got to let him do it.” Mikoshiba shrugged. “That said I wouldn’t be such a good Captain without him to take care of what I can’t do. Manager is good at dealing with the school, with competitions, with the treasurer. Kiozumi as the vice-captain keeps me organized and everything running smoothly. Doesn’t sound like much but it allows me to focus on you all. That kind of leads in to what I wanted to talk to you about, Matsuoka”

Rin straightened, brows furrowed as he watched Mikoshiba hoist himself up to sit on the desk and grin at him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I've always tend to see Rin as really dramatic in his head. Also a stupid mix of really prideful and then having like the worst self-image. So hopefully I'm doing him justice.
> 
> We're catching up to the kinkmeme. I'm only one chapter ahead there so updates will be slowing down soon.


	5. Chapter 5

It wasn’t very serious for Mikoshiba to be sitting on the desk, but it was daunting. He was already a goddamn tree and being the desk Rin really had to still look up. Mikoshiba looked serious, which always seemed a rather solemn expression on him. Rin was still unnerved at how Mikoshiba either looked like an adorable dork or like the badass final boss villain leading to happily ever after. Still, knowing Mikoshiba only had three settings seemed like an achievement. It also put him on a more complex scale than most of the people Rin knew, who were lucky to have two regular settings in common use.

“I guess first I should check. You’re swimming here next year, right?”

Rin blinked, before glaring in confusion up at Mikoshiba. “Of course.” Hell, half the reason he was so bothered was because he wanted to be a part of this team. Not to mention that he was pretty sure he’d been protected as well as he had been from the stunt he’d pulled at the competition was the promise that he’d swim again for them and bring back a trophy, or break a record.

Mikoshiba shrugged. “Didn’t know if you would want to transfer to Iwatobi or some such.”

Rin shook his head. “No.” While he wanted to stay in touch with the others the simple fact was that Iwatobi’s swim team was subpar and he couldn’t stomach the idea of being there. It wasn’t competitive, not like this. For those guys it was perfect. Haru didn’t have the dedication or motivation for real competition, Makoto had no desire to take swimming as a life choice, and if Nagisa didn’t get a growth spurt soon he likely wouldn’t be able to even if he desired. Which, Rin doubted he did. He had no idea about Rei, but if he was with the others Rin was sure he’d be ok. They could all get scholarships maybe but that was about it. And that would require joining the swim team in their college of choice- something that might kill the apathetic Haru.

Rin wanted to swim competitively. That much he knew. He licked his lips and shrugged up at Mikoshiba. “I’m going to swim here. And I’m going to take the swim team to the fucking regionals again and we’re going to slaughter the competition. Besides, Haru brings out the ass in me.”

Mikoshiba laughed, nodding. “Good. Don’t ever lose your competitive streak, Matsuoka.” The older boy paused then to collect himself. “Part of what I wanted to talk to you about was, if you’re staying here, if you wanted to look into the Vice Captain spot. You wouldn’t want to be manager, and don’t take this the wrong way but you’re not Captain material Rin. You don’t really inspire much motivation. But you’re incredibly smart and you’ve got an eye for techniques. You’d have a position of notice and you’d help keep the swim team at its peak, which sounds like it’ll matter to you. And I want you to care, and I want to put your knowledge to use. You’d work with the next captain to make regimes and schedules, work on swim members, and generally help keep things under control. It’s not nearly as much paper work as Kiozumi makes it be, either.”

“What?”

“And it would help with your college of choice. I’ve been talking to recruiters a lot, and they’re already looking at you. Or your year. And they know you, and some are reluctant, so being vice-captain will help. You said you were aiming for the Olympics. Are you, still?”

Rin swallowed. Did he still want the Olympics? He glanced down, looking at Mikoshiba’s shoes. “I don’t have much else,” he muttered.

“Bullshit,” Mikoshiba said, startling him. Then added, “Matsuoka you’re on your second year of high school and what, sixteen? You are not stuck in your position in life. You only are, ever, if you give up and let yourself be. You’re smart- grades wise especially since I know you have to have good grades to be on the team- you’re one of the most dedicated people I know when you apply yourself, and let’s be honest. Athletes go to about thirty, we can go longer but that depends on each person. Thirty is young, still. Sixty years left, keeping numbers even. What the fuck are you going to do with those sixty years? If you get gold, do good, break records, go professional, you’re probably set for a while at least. Work endorsements, play up the politics of being famous. But that’s only if you do gold- better than gold in most cases. Gold only gets you so far.”

Rin blinked. “I hadn’t…“ he hadn’t thought that far. Apparently, Mikoshiba had. Rin had never asked and didn’t know but… was he going to the Olympics?

“You’re an amazing swimmer, Matsuoka. But you’re more than that and you shouldn’t sell yourself short. Because if you do, everybody else will. If you don’t stand tall, the rest of the world will walk all over you- especially if you go professional. You are smart, you are observant, you’re good with people when you want to be, and you’re dedicated. You’re motivated. That’s so much more than other people. I’ve seen people who are smart and I’ve seen people who are talented, and they have half of what you do because you work. And that’s to be commended.”

Rin blushed. Having somebody say there was something else to him, something more than just swimming- his heart thundered. Mikoshiba was looking at him and those eyes were so damn bright and Rin wanted to look away. Wanted them to look away. He didn’t know what to do under those eyes, intense and bright, focused on him. Had Mikoshiba been watching him? For how long? And what had he seen that he cared? Rin shrunk farther into the chair. “I don’t know.”

Mikoshiba blinked, face turning from that intense expression to something solemn again. “Sorry- I’m being stupid. And excuse my language. I just, you can do whatever you want. That includes the Olympics of course. And, I’ve been talking to some trainers- something I came here for. Apparently there’s a letter for me,” he said, glancing back at the desk with a grimace. “But trainers and recruiters are already noticing you, not for the best reasons, but you’re noticed. And I wanted to just make sure you knew.”

“You’re going to the Olympics?”

“I’m aiming for it. Will be doing college on the side. Training will get even more intense once I graduate school. My trainer is already pushing for more. He was the meeting I had to leave early for.” Mikoshiba paused to collect his thoughts. “Anyway, you’re going to start getting things from them. The recruiters and trainers. Nothing official yet, trainers will be pushier and will require something sooner. But you’re on such a strict training session now that you won’t be in much trouble, I think. You keep up with me, anyway.”

Rin nodded slowly, keeping his eyes averted because he was still trying to comprehend everything. He’d almost stopped thinking so hard about the future after the regionals. It was weird to be thinking about it again. It was scary. Rin ran a hand through his hair and took a steadying breath.

“That’s mostly all I wanted to say. If you want to be the vice-captain there’s some form to fill out. It takes some time, so if you wanted to join another club or something- find yourself a hobby so you have something you can still do it just have to manage your time.”

“Captain has to take more time.”

“It does. But I enjoy it too much to not. Besides, if I don’t make it to Olypmics it’ll look good. Especially if I want to go into training or being a coach.” Mikoshiba shrugged.

Rin watched him from under his bangs as he slid off the desk and reached for an envelope. “Can I have the form. In case I want to?”

“Hm? Sure, let me find it.” Mikoshiba sounded so happy over that little give and Rin tried to keep his heart from beating too hard against his ribcage. Being vice-captain meant less time but that was good for Rin. Rin didn’t do well with a lot of free time. He took the paper carefully, not making eye contact, and the two left. Rin tried not to be rude, quickly making an excuse and running off, not even waving behind him to make it back into his dorm and crawl into his bed where he tried to suffocate himself with a pillow.

“Senpai?” Ai said, hanging over the side and Rin tried harder with the pillow.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I feel like I should have more confidence in my Rin and Mikoshiba because I started this and it is obviously focused on them but I'm really not.
> 
> Anyway, my favorite headcanon is Mikoshiba and Rin going to the Olympics together and winning golds. Especially considering how good of a swimmer Mikoshiba is, like hot damn Captain Speedo where'd you hide the rocket?
> 
> Comments and critiques always welcome.


	6. Chapter 6

The next week was a week of staring at that damn form and trying to figure out his future beyond ‘graduate’ and ‘Olympics’ Rin also dealt with a nonhelpful Ai and thoughts. Bad horrible thoughts like holding hands and making out in pools and what Mikoshiba’s favorite breakfast is. Ai had some sort of notion that they were living a movie and that Mikoshiba was just going to fall in his lap with a few cliché happenstances and batting his eyelashes up at Mikoshiba. Which, if Rin was cute, might work. 

But Rin wasn’t cute and he didn’t want this thing to get worse. He didn’t want this stupid crush to develop into something that was more than a mild distraction and vague fantasy. Ai was embarrassing, but it was Mikoshiba who unknowingly kept dragging him down with being everything Rin didn’t want him to be. His looks were everything Rin liked, tall and big and flashy. The personality wasn’t horrible either. A bit stupid at social cues, but he was happy and honest. Perhaps too honest. But he could also be powerful and that appealed to Rin. Rin was going to lose it quick and he did not want that. At all.

So, the form had been a bad idea because every time he looked at it he thought back to the office and Mikoshiba being angry and passionate for him, like he was worth that. Rin hadn’t had somebody speak about him like that in a long time. He could swim, now. He was good, now. He had ripped out his finger nails clawing his way up, fighting for the right to own this talent. He could swim, he’d proven that. And it had cost him so much. If he hadn’t of been so lucky, if the others hadn’t of cared so much, he’d of lost even more.

He sighed, pretending to ignore the stupid form, grabbing his cap and leaving the dorm. He had a playdate with Haru, under the supervision of Daddy Makoto. His jacket was tossed on as he jogged towards the pool. To be honest he wasn’t much looking forward to the two of them alone either. It was something else watching them. Something annoying and grating in the quiet moments. It was gross, in the same way as watching your parents kiss is gross. Not to mention being ignored was something that would forever annoy Rin. It really was a wonder sometimes why he liked the two of them so much. 

He waited at the pool, stretching in the meantime. He could hear Makoto when they approached. He hopped back up to his feet, watching as they entered. Makoto was chatting amiably and Haru was staring at the water like it was a long lost love. Rin just didn’t get it. Still, even now he didn’t get it and he didn’t get how Makoto did. Or how Makoto didn’t care. Rin wasn’t sure which that was either. He ran a hand through his hair and approached, nodding when Makoto waved. “Glad you could actually make it,” he said snidely.

“Nagisa and Rei said they’d come down if they finished studying in time but they told us not to wait for them.”

“Nagisa is going to study?” Rin raised a brow at them. He couldn’t imagine Nagisa studying. Especially not with Rei who the blonde found so damn distracting apparently. But then Nagisa found anything distracting and was liable to run into traffic sometimes. So Rin didn’t actually fault Rei too much.

“Rei is going to try to get it to work,” Makoto said, both of them ignoring that Haru was already making his way past them to strip. “Thank you for inviting us,” Makoto said.

Rin waved it away, turning back to Haru. “Have you gotten any better Haru-chan?” Rin called. It earned him a deadly glare. Rin snickered as he approached the pool. “Bet I could still stomp you at a race.”

Makoto quietly sighed and that did nothing to deter both of them from getting in a lane and racing. Rin had never found anybody else to really race against. Which was hilariously sentimental of him, probably, since there were people who actually swam butterfly for him to compete against, or even those who swam better than Haru, both here and in Australia. Yet it was Haru that Rin loved to race the most. He loved to win against everybody, but there was something about racing Haru that really made his heart race and world narrow to nothing but his lane and Haru’s.

Eventually even they had to stop, Haru floating off on his back and Rin hoisting himself up beside Makoto. There was something precious about the way Makoto looked at Haru, Rin thought as he stole a glance. Makoto looked happy just to experience Haru’s happiness, to be there. To witness it, to maybe be a part of it. It was another reason nothing ever happened between Rin and Haru. Rin couldn’t do that. He couldn’t comprehend Haru, and he needed too. Makoto just always seemed so happy, blessed to be with Haru. Even when Haru wasn’t swimming, when he was being a fucking prick or antisocial old man about things, Makoto still looked at him like that. And there was a part of Rin that was extremely proud to witness it, and jealous that he didn’t have something similar.

Still, it was something that Rin had always liked about Makoto. Things hadn’t been perfect as kids, Rin knew he’d caused waves. It’s what he did. But Makoto was kind and Rin had depended on him. Makoto always seemed supporting, bright, accepting. Rin had needed that as much as he needed Haru to be a goal, a rival. Now he realized he all but forced both of them into that role. He wiped his face with a towel, frowning. Which was a mistake because Makoto cared too damn much about everybody.

“Rin? Is everything okay?”

“Yea,” Rin said, shrugging. He knew that wouldn’t be enough for Makoto though. “I’ve just been spending too much time thinking and don’t know how to stop.”

Makoto smiled, knowingly. “That can be dangerous.”

Rin snorted, dropping the towel. “No shit.”

Makoto glanced away then, back out to the pool. “If you ever want to talk about it, I’ll gladly listen.”

Makoto was like that too. Never pressuring, never pushing too hard. It was a gentle pull, a soft sort of manipulation that you didn’t always realize was happening but it worked out anyway for Makoto. Rin pushed his hair back and sighed. He had no idea how to talk to Makoto. Which was fucking hilarious because Makoto was probably the easiest person in the world to talk to. But out of everybody he felt distance between the two of them. Rin didn’t know if he was scared of facing Makoto or of hurting Makoto. Either way it was stupid and Rin just continued to flounder in front of the other swimmer whenever he considered talking to him. 

Rin nodded. “Thanks.”

Makoto just turned to him that bright, soft smile and then they heard the phone. It wasn’t Rin’s and Haru’s phone was probably being used as a paperweight somewhere, so Makoto stood up. Haru responded then from his lethargic floating to look as Makoto walked to his bag and then removed himself for privacy. Rin watched Haru then. It was harder to see with Haru. Those bright blue eyes turned back and met Rin’s, face impassive and bitchy looking as always as they stared. Rin scowled. “You turn into a fish yet?” Rin asked.

Haru floated closer, glancing at the direction Makoto had gone before looking back at him. “Stop worrying Makoto,” he said.

“Wow thanks for caring.” Haru didn’t respond to the sarcasm, of course. He simply floated there. Rin rested his head in his hand. “You two finally stopping all the horribly domestic shit and hiding behind best friends?”

Haru then glared up at him and Rin smirked. “We are best friends.”

Rin rolled his eyes. “And?” When Haru didn’t say anything in the moment of pause Rin growled. “If you two don’t get around that fucking term you’re going to kill everybody else in embarrassment from the way you two act. Just get together dammit and kiss.”

Haru huffed, averting his gaze and- was he blushing? Rin grinned. “We are best friends,” Haru repeated. “And he’s my boyfriend.” He looked back, eyes so confident when he announced that. Rin was jealous again and scowled down at him.

“You’re such a lucky bastard Haru,” he said, which was rude and really Rin knew in a way this entire conversation was rude. Considering stigma he shouldn’t have just asked like that, and really it was personal business. If they weren’t ready to tell him what reason did he have to pry? But he didn’t know of any other way to talk to Haru, not really. Which was probably telling about both of them. But still, he added roughly, “He is too.”

Haru might have smiled but Rin wasn’t sure. There was a moment of silence then, the soft murmur of Makoto talking on the phone in the back, and Rin considered a moment. It was stupid and it didn’t matter. He wasn’t going to do anything about it but still he could feel the pressure and he still thought about Mikoshiba here and he couldn’t do anything but ask, “What’d you do to make him look at you like that?”

Haru blinked, surprised, before his eyes drifted to Makoto there behind Rin. He stared, licking his lips and that was it. For once Rin waited even tho there probably wasn’t an answer and even if there was it wouldn’t work for Rin. But still, he wanted to know Haru’s answer. The swimmer didn’t look back at him when he did find his words. “I don’t know.”

Rin nodded, laughing at himself. Haru turned to look at him, frowning. But he didn’t swim off and maybe this was Haru’s awkward way of caring. His weird way of asking if he could help, because maybe Haru noticed too. Rin shook his head before grinning and quickly changing the tone of the conversation. “Sure you didn’t seduce him? That the reason you’re always stripping all the time?”

Haru scowled again, huffing. “That doesn’t work on Makoto.”

Rin had been sliding back into the water, needing to train and stop thinking but chocked a bit when he heard that response. Between choking and laughing he finally got out, “Then what does?”

Haru narrowed his eyes at him before dunking under the water and pushing off against the wall. He was beautiful and graceful, weaving through the water like he was born in it and Rin watched. It was better this way. Rin wasn’t entirely sure he wanted an answer anyway. When Makoto came back, sitting on his haunches and glancing at him, Rin couldn’t think of anything appropriate to say and launched off to his lane as well, wondering what worked on Mikoshiba and hating himself for that traitorous thought.

Makoto eventually pulled Haru from the water, the sky changing colors. Rin slid back into his jacket and sweats, walking with them to the train. They walked so close, like they always did. Makoto chatted idly, talking about how they needed to get home and he’d have to babysit the twins, and that they’d probably end up working on their class project tonight. Rin didn’t really know the twins, but they sounded like hellions. Rin couldn’t help but smile when Makoto recanted their antics. 

“Hey,” Rin said as they reached the station. “How dare you not tell me,” he said.

Haru narrowed his eyes at him, probably because he was talking to Makoto, who looked surprised and upset. “What?”

“But, congratulations. And anybody gives you problems tell me so I can give them some.”

Makoto still looked terribly confused, looking from him to Haru. They stared a moment and then Makoto blushed and looked back to Rin. “We didn’t- I didn’t mean to- I’m sorry.”

Rin shook his head. “You’re gonna miss the train and I’m not going to sit here and wait with you two idiots if you do.”

Makoto startled then, glancing at the time. “You’re right. We really have to go.” Then he looked back to Rin with a bright smile. “Thank you, Rin.”

He shrugged, looking away and waving them off. Rin watched for a bit, before his shoulders sagged and he turned to make his way back to his dorm. He stopped for food, picking up something for Ai as an afterthought, and didn’t return until it was dark. Ai was there, working at the desk. He looked up, surprised when Rin dropped the bag next to the papers. “Rin-senpai?” Ai called, looking from the bag to him as he shed his jacket and found a change of clothes. Unlike Haru he couldn’t wear his jammers all night.

“What?”

“Is everything ok?”

Rin snorted, grabbing his clothes and turning his back to Ai. It was silent after that, besides the rustle of clothes and the bag. Rin flopped down onto his bunk and stared at Ai’s back for a moment. It was silent like that until Ai turned to toss the trash, where he caught Rin’s eye and gave him a curious stare, head tilted a bit. “Thank you, for the food.”

Rin grunted, realized he’d been staring, and reached for his bag.

“Oh- ah I was supposed to tell you. There’s going to be another party. You’re invited, of course.”

Rin glanced back, considering. Parts of the swim team had always thrown causal parties. There were larger ones, when competitions were won and such. He’d gone to those because it was required, in a sort of unwritten way. Especially if it was an away competition and he didn’t just have the option to return to his dorm. These casual ones though he’d never gone too. But now- “When is it?”

Ai smiled brightly, so damn excitable as he told him the date and place.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I apologize for the lateness. Holiday responsibilities stole my attention.
> 
> Here's where MakoHaru becomes explicit and Rin slowly comes to terms with his issue before deciding it'd be better shoved in a box and forgotten forever. Even tho that doesn't work. The MakoHaru will show up a few more times, but it really won't be that big of a part. I'm also considering of doing something small of this chapter from either Makoto's or Haru's POV but we'll see if intent ever reaches paper.
> 
> As always comments or critiques always welcome.


	7. Chapter 7

Rin expected things to be awkward for a bit considering his straightforward approach to Makoto, but received a text the next day and wondered if he had been stupid to worry. Which he was anyway because it was done and he couldn’t take it back. But he couldn’t understand why they’d try to hide it anyway because the two had been sickeningly close since they were young. The red head sighed and ran a hand through his hair as he walked and felt his phone vibrate. Ai liked updating him about the cat he’d found at the back of the pool. Rin was hoping that he wasn’t going to come back to their dorm one day and find a little orange cat with folded ears getting fur over everything. It seemed inevitable, but he was secretly hopeful.

Ai was running a bit late, and was going to be later now if that was a text of the stupid kitten. Rin sighed and knocked on the door. He frowned when the door opened, but nodded when he was let in. He didn’t remember the guy’s name but his face was familiar. They had gotten a study room in the library, two of the team members working in the library as seniors replacing downtime for credit (one needed it, one wanted it). That was how they got two rooms, the divider pushed in, for the entire night. The tables had been moved against the wall, a few members in the nicer chairs, others on the table, and more than a few on the floor. Pillows were scattered around and it was generally chaos. Rin cringed as he stepped walked in.

There were already multiple conversations going and only a few people looked up and grinned when they saw him, some calling out in mock surprise about him being there. Rin sorta snarled at them, telling them they should be thankful he decided to show his face here, and glanced around for a place to sit. It was better than he thought, his welcoming. He ran a hand through his bangs, the ponytail probably loosening and he’d have to redo it. He sat on a pillow, getting comfortable before reaching for his phone. It was a text and it was from Ai, so Rin wasn’t too upset he had waited to respond and sighed as he unlocked his phone to see the latest cat picture.

“The folded ears are adorable,” a deep voice said behind him and Rin jumped, turning in his seat to look up at Mikoshiba, who was bending over and grinning. “Your cat?”

“No.”

“Oh. It’s cute.”

Rin thought for a moment about keeping the cat in his dorm and Mikoshiba would be one of the few who knew and he would help him keep it a secret, him and Ai, and it would be just like one of those tacky romances and that was why he stopped thinking. Also because he wasn’t out to seduce the captain. Because how did you seduce a guy who was into cute things when you were 177 centimeters and were about 68 kilograms of muscle? Not that Rin wanted to.

“Ai found it.”

“Oh? So it’s at school. That’s sad,” Mikoshiba said with a frown, looking back at the phone.

“You like cats?”

“They’re cute. Never had one before, or a dog sadly. Sister had a bunny tho, and that was cute.”

“You really like cute things. It’s not just cute girls are your type, it’s actually just you like cute things.” It wasn’t much of a question really.

“Hm? Well yea.”

There was something to be said about how easily Mikoshiba accepted it. He was oddly alright, confident even with himself. Maybe it was a show but it was believable and that was the important part. Rin was jealous. He’d always been drawn to confidence, most people were honestly, but self-surety wasn’t something he had. It was one of the reasons he had attached himself to Haru who also projected that image. Rin glanced back down at the phone with a frown.

“Not big on obnoxiously cute things though, and I’ve never been the type who can wear cute things. Like your friend, the blonde one, never could pull that off.”

Rin mentally pictured a tiny Mikoshiba with a bow in his hair like he remembers Nagisa wearing once, tears in his eyes because Nagisa hadn’t been able to deal with his sister’s bullying back then, and snickered. He couldn’t imagine it working either. Not that he knew what kind of kid Mikoshiba was but his first thought was the obnoxious loud kid all scraped knees and elbows. Mikoshiba seemed the type to have a very long awkward period, not just in height and grace. “I don’t feel sorry for you.”

Mikoshiba laughed. “You wouldn’t,” he said with a chuckle, straightening and glancing around. “Looks like everybody is arguing on what movie. You got a preference?” Apparently usually there were video games, and even board games sometimes brought to be played tournament style but the guy who had the console hadn’t fixed his in time. Board games were spread out already, one currently being flipped by the loser and laughs. Rin wasn’t good at board games. Video games he was good at, board games made him mad. 

“No.”

Mikoshiba nodded and turned to walk towards the guys with the computer, slapping one over the head. Rin A few more people showed up, Ai settling in next to Rin after saying hi to the others. He was oddly popular. Or, popular probably wasn’t the best word but the other guys liked him. Everybody was loud and Rin ended up getting in an argument with another guy over which video game in a series was the best, Ai being unhelpful by mostly just laughing at them. Ai was not a competitive or hardcore gamer, no matter how dedicated he was to Pokemon.

 

They didn’t quiet down, the entire little area around Rin joining in the argument, which turned into which character was stronger and or the most badass. Which was even more opinion than what it started as and it was all very surprising that they calmed down to watch the movie. Rin stretched out on his pillow and looking at the screen, laptop connected to the projector, and was interested in what movie they were watching at least until he realized it was a horror movie. Rin stiffened, pulling his legs up to sit cross legged, frowning. He wasn’t as bad as Makoto, not even close, but he didn’t understand the joy of fear. There were a few groans, one guy screaming this movie wasn’t even scary c’mon guys ugh! and some laughter. Ai seemed completely unfazed which meant all short people truly unable to feel fear for they were what others feared or he didn’t realize what this movie was.

 

Rin got through horror movies by not moving at all, barely breathing, and waiting for it to be over. Rin got over invested in movies and stories and he couldn’t actually throw a punch at the thing scaring him if it was just a movie. He inhaled quietly, deeply, through the nose and watched the stupid people in the movie did stupid things. If he remembered right this was one of those creepy ones that was more psychological than simply a mad man chasing people with really shrill screams and gore thrown around for effect. Rin couldn’t look away as the characters began that downward spiral that would ruin everything. 

“Rin-senpai are you alright?” Ai whispered, leaning over and looking at him.

Rin jumped, head swinging from the screen, eyes wide. “Yes,” he said, proud he didn’t squeak.

“Darn I knew I should have gotten Mikoshiba-senpai to sit closer,” Ai muttered, hand to his chin as he thought about it. 

“No,” Rin hissed quietly, “shut up!” Nobody else needed to hear that! And what even was Ai talking about? Mikoshiba did not need to see him scared stiff over a stupid movie. This was bad enough with just Ai noticing. Except the moment he looked back to the movie, a glance, the monster and twitching and effects and scream happened and Rin didn’t have his defense to such thing by staying completely stock still and ended up making an embarrassing shrill noise in the back of his throat and thrashing, landing on Ai who let out an actual scream of surprise from Rin’s movements. They weren’t the only ones, a fucking miracle Rin was thankful for, but everybody near them was looking and Rin wanted to die.

People laughed at them and Rin didn’t know what to do when they all called Ai like he’d been the one to yank Rin down in terror. But Ai just laughed at them, shrugging and admitted he’d been startled. Not by the movie of course, but apparently he wasn’t going to clarify. Rin glanced down at Ai as the younger boy detached himself from Rin, having grabbed his jacket for dear life when Rin had fallen over on him. 

They moved back, Rin hardly watching the screen now because everything was ruined, and the room was filled with harsh whispers and laughter, some people telling off the characters, and every once in a while a loud curse. Rin made sure he did not move again, glancing up at the happier music at the end to see the credits starting to roll. Rin sighed, until he saw Ai smiling at him and he glared. Ai’s smile mostly disappeared and he glanced away. Everybody started to argue on meanings and what happened and who was a scared baby and no they’re not a baby you asshole we know where you sleep. Rin was busy fixing his ponytail, having no opinion on conspiracy theories because he hadn’t watched the whole movie, at least until Ai perked up.

Mikoshiba was standing, pocketing his own phone. “Alright, idiots, pizza is here. I’m going to go get it. You put in another movie I want explosions. And somebody better be listening to unlock the door for me when I get back.”

There were a lot of ‘yes captains’ and Ai was getting up so Rin panicked again because Ai still was trying to be matchmaker. “Let me help you, Captain.”

“Glad somebody is working for their damn food.”

The entire room let out indignant gasps. A few, “I brought drinks!” or “I brought money!” or “I brought the chips!” and one or two “I’m allergic to work you know that Captain!” were yelled and Rin watched Ai go with a glare. This time it did not shake that smile at all as Ai almost skipped to exit with Mikoshiba. Three guys to the left started throwing the snacks at each other, but Rin noticed the others with their quiet whispers and ugly snickers. He knew Nitori was popular enough, not exactly they guy everybody admired and wanted to be friends with but the younger boy was helpful and approachable. Rin had heard things, of course, at first when he joined. But Rin didn’t really pay attention and when he did he didn’t really understand. Ai was a freshman, he didn’t have extensive training prior, and he was improving at a good rate. Had been even before Rin had taken to helping, Mikoshiba keeping everybody on good training regimes that worked if they kept to it. Not the best, but the swim team was large enough that not everybody got their own.

And Ai’s improvement was more than some of the assholes, and that was more important than starting better. Rin had looked at times, paid attention, and to be honest some of it had just been pride at first. Few people had times like his, and that was half the point. Still, some people found Ai an easy target, or just didn’t like that he was, even Rin could admit, pushy and over eager. Still, he was better than those shitbags. Rin growled, turning his attention away as they started arguing over the next movie. They had hardly come down to just options before the argument degraded to something else. Rin almost felt bad for the guy waiting with the computer.

“Should we wait for Mikoshiba? He seemed to care?”

“He just wanted to make sure everybody didn’t piss their panties.”

“Shut the hell up Takahashi! I swear to fucking god I will suffocate you with your pillow!”

Then there was laughter and more food was thrown. Rin growled when some hit him, finding something to throw back with a snarl. Even as everybody got stupidly loud there was a feeling of relief that filled the entire room when there was a loud knock at the door. Rin huffed, shaking the chips off his jacket as the door was opened, Ai and Mikoshiba shuffling in with the boxes. Everybody was up, making a line and loud still, Mikoshiba reprimanding all of them for not deciding on a movie.

Rin moved to get up until he saw Ai shake his head and eventually brought over their plates, smiling. Everybody got two slices and Ai knew what kind he liked. Rin grinned, getting comfortable as Ai settled beside him. Rin wanted to ask what Ai had done because he didn’t believe Ai didn’t do anything, but wouldn’t risk talking about that surrounded by the team. Rin settled for glowering at Ai as the other happily munched on his pizza.

The movie was eventually decided, a classic Rin had seen before a few times and wouldn’t admit that the first two times he watched it had cried because the dog died so now he just didn’t watch that scene, and he glanced at Ai when he asked. “Yea, I’ve seen it a few times,” Rin said with a shrug.

“Is it good?”

“You haven’t?”

“No. I’ve heard of it before,” Ai said.

“It’s horrible when I’m more caught up on shit than you are.”

Ai laughed, rocking a bit as he nodded. Everybody was trying to settle back down, pillows stolen, one plate dropped, and the speakers almost blown with the beginning of the movie starting and so everybody screamed in response because that was natural reaction to loud noises. Rin’s heart had jumped at the loud drowning sound of the beginning of the movie, forgetting it entirely it’d been a while since he’d watched the movie, and it did not help him any when Mikoshiba settled by him with a plate, leaning against the wall and grinning. Ai leaned forward to see him, looking absolutely giddy. Mikoshiba shrugged a shoulder and explain. “Jerks took my pillow.” He smiled brightly when he said it and Rin forgot to smile back.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok so life got hectic with responsibilities and I dealt with it by writing Makoharu panty porn instead of this. I also have a vague idea of another makoharu thing that I want to do, and since this took me a damn week I might be slow again.
> 
> But really, yes, this took me about a week to write total because I was slow and it was off and on and I'm just tired of looking at this chapter at this point. It's not as edited as much as I personally attempt for all of you. It is longer than the average chapter though, so there's that for all of you.

**Author's Note:**

> Tags are to be updated as things happen.
> 
> This is from the kinkmeme.


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